MY APPROACH & TECHNIQUES
TANTRIC TREATMENT – „A path of personal growth through pleasure and joy“
My main tool, and a necessary part of every session with me, is a „tantric“ approach – that is, loving, conscious, full attention; openness free of expectation, judgement, and prejudice of any kind toward the client's stated or unspoken but evident or sensed needs; and respect for the client's individuality, dignity, and wishes, as well as for both my boundaries and the client's. The goals of a session can vary, but most often move toward release, revival, awakening energy, opening the channels of kundalini energy, sensitizing the body, increasing awareness of one's own body, whole-body ecstatic states, and alternative or thoroughly physical pleasure and orgasms. In other words – „tantra can't be done wrong“ as long as there is a meaningful intent toward honest self-acceptance and self-love.
Depending on the client's wishes, I use ethereal, gentle, firm, rough, and even mildly painful touch, fast or dynamic movements, slow relaxing ones, or barely noticeable movement, or simply the presence of my touch. I touch with feathers, fur, scarves, small brushes, fingertips, whole fingers, palms, forearms, knees, feet, or my whole body, as well as floggers, ropes, and scratchy or prickly objects – again according to the client's wishes and agreement.
A session can be fully dressed, partly dressed, in underwear or otherwise half-naked or fully naked – on the client's side as well as mine – all according to the client's wishes, courage, and comfort, and their intent for the session. I may touch you in places you choose, over the whole body excluding intimate areas, or holistically, including inside your body, if you specifically request such treatment. I may use washing the body with hot cloths or ice water; offer unexpectedly ecstatic experiences of the so-called „fourth dimension“ – massage of the nasal cavities, ears, and mouth during your meditation. I can offer releasing and restorative techniques of vaginal and anal mapping or massage, including internal massage of the coccyx and the area of the „nest“ of kundalini serpent energy – if you explicitly request such treatment.
Whether the above scared you or intrigued you – it is always a very natural, flowing massage and care that follows the client's own attunement, because the goal is the client's growth through pleasure.
SHIBARI – „Ropes replace a loving embrace – I'm not an octopus, so rope stands in for hands.“
Shibari, or Kinbaku, are Japanese words associated with the Eastern school of bondage – that is, tying. In its modern form Shibari can be one element within BDSM. But Shibari isn't only for people who love pain-suffering or, conversely, hurting others – often people seek out some form of tying for the experience of an intense embrace, surrender, and stillness that leads, for example, to inner release and calm in the person being tied. The goals of Shibari can again cover a very wide range, and each rope session can take on a different flavor, intent, and role for the person tying and the person being tied, depending on the mood. I use traditional jute, hemp, or coconut ropes prepared with special processes for Shibari; for tying on intimate areas I use synthetic ropes instead, for hygiene reasons – jute simply can't be washed after every session. The most common reason my clients seek out Shibari is a taste for a little pleasant pain, but above all a feeling of surrender – to a dominant rigger (the one who ties) – and to experience connecting with themselves and the so-called sub-space or rope-space – a sense of being pulled out of everyday life into a kind of alternative reality of calm, silence, safety, and firm touch. Some people compare these feelings to a child's sense of being inside the womb, safe, held firmly, and happy. I personally also enjoy experiencing the same – I'm what's called a switch, with a stronger dominant and mildly sadistic preference.
„Tantric“ BDSM – „Dark eros – getting to know my dark sides and shadows and learning to accept them as part of myself.“
BDSM is a broad term for various ways, and various reasons, to experience some form of „pressure“, discomfort, pain, humiliation, or surrender – or the opposite side, applying all of the above to someone else. Within my own comfort zone I use light to moderately intense practices, and only for the purpose of offering the experience of mild pain, mild discomfort, a sense of a firm embrace and being tied, surrender, and thus my dominance. The reason I set my own use of BDSM apart into a subcategory sometimes called „tantric BDSM“ or also „conscious BDSM“ is that I don't offer clients or my loved ones the part of BDSM pleasure that aims purely and exclusively at a feeling of humiliation or of being hurt or tormented and pained, without any further reach into a spiritual, nourishing, and life-affirming dimension.
TANTRA-SHIBARI OR SHIBARI-TANTRA?
I like to combine everything above – because I feel it's exactly the kind of symphony of experience you could compare, say, to sweet chocolate with chili or pepper. From my point of view the path of tantra is ideal, but many people find it hard to relax easily, to disconnect from daily obligations, tasks, and also thoughts – in other words, to „switch off“ the mind's control… This is where BDSM/Shibari techniques come to help – they bring the client into a state of calm, release, being „here and now“, and awareness of every part of the body – because something hurts a little, or they experience some other intense sensation, which focuses a person's concentration on feelings and emotions and allows the mind to switch off, fairly quickly. At that point the tantric path steps in and leads into depth and inner experience, awakening inner energies and forces, clearing energy channels, releasing blocks. This combination is therefore very well suited to the modern „scattered“ person – emancipated women buried in tasks in a man's world, and men under the weight of daily obligations and worries about family, livelihood, and the future.